Thursday, January 11, 2007

So thats what letter openers are for...

A freak accident today at work. I won't use the word 'tragedy' as poor Lorries nerves are shot after "Blizzard '07". But it was practically a tragedy. If it wasn't for my quick thinking and the help of my coworker, I don't even want to think about what might have happened. I was going about my morning routine, opening the mail and such. One envelope was stapled shut so I ran my finger along the seam to open it. I honestly don't know how it happened, its a medical mystery, but somehow the darned staple got lodged into my finger. Like really lodged. It hurt like hell. At first I thought I must have got a papercut or something. Imagine my horror when I looked at my finger and saw half of a staple poking out of it. But this is one benefit of working in a doctors office- I rummaged through the med cupboards and found some BetaCain- a topical anisthetic. I slathered a bunch of that on and then it went kind of numb. And then I took a pair of forcepts and asked my coworker to remove it. It hurt. It was bad. There was blood. So then I cleaned it up and put some more betacain on it, which helped. So that was the first part of the tragedy. Now I must face another grueling procedure. I need a tetanus shot. My coworker is going to give it to me, but I begged her to wait until the end of the day. Haven't I been through enough already?? Give my body a chance to recover from my first wound. But now I see the utility of a letter opener. I have always wondered, who the hell uses a letter opener. I mean, how god damned lazy can you be?? Is it really so hard to rip an envelope? But now I know- it's not hard, but it is dangerous. So now I'm thinking that those will make great gifts for people with birthdays coming up (Lorrie- that means you). I would like to get one for work but the budget is probably blown now with that fancy coffee pot and now the trolley.

I am sure that all of you are wondering about the state of my breasts. So I will tell you that they continue to be sore. And because I do not like to wait and also because I work in a doctors office with easy access to pregnancy tests I broke down and took one. It was negative, of course. But now I have a new idea. I think that a blood test is more sensitive than a urine test so I might ask the doc this afternoon if she will order one, and I will do it tomorrow. Another benefit of working in a doctors office: you can order tests on yourself pretty much. And get the results faxed to myself. And I will add the word STAT to the req. so it will be back fast. Otherwise I'd have to wait the weekend anyways, and that would defeat the whole purpose. I just suddenly had this vision of myself three months down the line, still trying to get pregnant but with track marks all over my arms like a junkie from multiple blood tests. If I get to that point, please just tell me that I'm losing it. Anyways, that is it for now as it is hard to type with this finger, which is all bandaged up and still kind of numb. Apparently, painful though it is, staple wounds do not qualify for workers comp. I honestly don't know what it takes if that doesn't qualify.
Enjoy your day and do take extra care opening your mail today if you have not already done so.


vsorowski said...

Soldier on, that is You! Working on this blog, plunking away on the keyboard, minus the use of one digit---You are brave, strong and courageous, as like the postal workers, Blizzard 07, still delivering!!!REMARKABLE! I am excited about your breasts and will anticipate TWO great outcomes tomorrow _Lorrie and Trents babys ultrasound and your Bloodwork!! I am also quite releived to hear about your hubby's redemption last evening--Funny how storms affect people! Love Ma Hi Nikki

gailcathcart said...

What a trooper you are, injured yet still making entries in your blog! I don't think you can test often enough for a pending pregnancy, if the first comes back negative it is probably just a mistake. Keep on testing and writing. I will pray for a speedy recovery on your injury!
Love Aunt Gail

jayceelee said...

I would just like to comment on being some what of an admistrative assistant at work that I absolutly refuse to open mail with out a letter opener. If it is not available when the mail comes in I will let the mail sit on my desk unopened until it is found, and this could take days because my desk is a complete disaster. Also it makes a good head scratcher when you have your hair in a tight pony tail.

Lorrie said...

Oh my God, I can't believe my computer let me in here. Where do I start, I'm so freaking excited!!!! By the way my computer is from 19 diggity 2 not 9, and as for how old that actually is ask Glen he introduced me to it (but I think it means really really old).
First off I have to say Randine you are an amazing writer, your blog is the highlight of my day, (don't tell Glen I said that cause I think he thinks he is).
I have wanted to comment on all of your entries but I think I will just start here, I don't know that old 19 diggity 2 will allow me here for that long.
Okay, as far as the trauma you went through with the staple yesterday, I truely am sorry you went through that, you really should have phoned me I would have been there with you no one should go through that alone. YOU ARE SO BRAVE!!!!
Oh no my computer is making really loud noises, so I had better stop for now.
I will try again later.
love you lots Jenn

Lorrie said...

Oh shit, my name comes up as Lorrie, it's not though. The link I have is from her and that's how I got here, I will try to fix that.

Lorrie said...

This is the real Lorrie speaking and I don't take kindly to identity theft lady!!!!!! I gave you my info so you could read MY BLOG not hers, hahahah!!!!!! Good day to you and I am now prceeding to mine to see if you were there...if not, don't bother ever talking to me again biotch. Love LORRIE

Jenn said...

Hello...this is Lorrie as Jenn. SUCKA!!!!